The majority of women subconsciously want to find a man that their instinct recognizes the "strong". External signs of this "ideal": a strong (including physically), confident (to arrogance), adventurous, independent, not afraid of difficulties, ready to challenge, always active, the leader, ie it must be true male. But in our sterile, and the civilized world are not many places for people with these qualities! Of course, they sometimes occur, but it is a deviation than the norm. Civilization of care kills a man must be brave and physically strong - in a stable society, these qualities are simply nowhere to be, except that in the sport. Leader, active, independent - these qualities society welcomes when they manifest in moderation. If people are too independent, then it is very difficult to succeed in our society where not all depend on its merit, and where necessary at times to work in a team or in the structure, etc.

Men with the above combination of skills, can be found in the taiga, mountains, desert, internal affairs agencies or private protection, in informal groups and in prisons. And rarely as a manager in a bank or retailer - it requires a few other qualities. Not for nothing among the latest wave of oligarchs virtually no odious personalities. Today's millionaires earned their money, not by force and courage, and intelligence. They are nowhere to be seen, they do not like to appear publicly, they are inconspicuous dress, ie, they are not males. And to recognize them for their "strong male" only the mind but not soul.

Why do women look for strong men? We invite you to reflect and understand what need your soul (or your instincts), and your mind, and to share these claims. Reason requires that your partner has been successful in society, ie knew how to make money, he held a good position and will provide you and your children a good future. And instinct demands that he was a strong, courageous, decisive, energetic, and so on But all these qualities "in a bottle" is not really required to thrive in society. You have to understand this contradiction is that the farther our society will take the path of civilization, the less "strong" (in the sense samtsovosti) men in it will occur. And the less it will meet those women unconsciously recognizes the "strong arm". This is our reality, and should be ready for it.

What to do, how to deal with the influence of the instincts, if they are constantly creating problems in your life, you become aware of their impact and would like to get rid of them? It is clear that these recommendations will only apply to those who want to change myself. And they will be totally useless if you will apply them to rework their vysokoprimativnyh close. Here you can give some of the recommendations arising from the common ways out of idealizations. After all, the instincts, helping large and unconscious influence on the people who are at the heart of idealization of the family and some other idealizations. Means to fight the instincts (after realizing their impact on your life) you can use the same tools that we use for non-idealization. Several such funds.

The first and indispensable tool for suppressing the influence of instincts - this is the will and desire of man. Will need to apply once you realize that your feelings are not in front of you is no reasonable, ie, They instinctively. In this case, you just give yourself the command: "I will not continue to pay attention to my wanton desire for this man and I will be guided only by my mind." This sounds, of course, is weak, but such an informed choice, sooner or later give its result - an instinct enough of it. And no longer affect your choices and actions.

 Positive statements

Following method is based on the fact that instincts are usually generate any intrusive thoughts. Therefore it is necessary to identify these specific ideas, articulate them and then work with them on common rules with negative attitudes. After identifying specific negative thoughts need to create the opposite of the sense of positive affirmation and repeat it over and over again as long as your instinct does not understand what he was fussing for nothing, and her kill. For example, you are always worried about the thought: "I want a baby, why I do not have? It's awful, that I was alone! I always need a child without him I can not live! "Did you write these characteristic ideas, and then compose a positive assertion, the opposite of those thoughts on the meaning and declaring the result, which you would like to achieve:" I enjoy every moment of my life! My life is full of meaning as a child, and without it! I believe in life and I know that in the future I'll be fine! "And then repeat, a positive statement as long as do not believe in him and will not be guided by them.

 

Another option - to devalue their unconscious strivings through humor, obsmeyat their instinctual urges. It is well suitable position in life, "Life is a circus" in which you - the clown, performing its role in the circus ring. You need to imagine that every time you find yourself under the influence of instinct, you become a clown, performing its role in the circus life. Your role is written on your hat with bells. It should be worded in such a way that you have your funny experiences or aspirations. For example, your role can be called "can not live without a male," "Looking for a male-producer", "Give it to rely on" - with the endless search for a "strong man's shoulder." "Everybody lie down", "Suicide osemenitel", "Raging member" - for men who want but can not cope with his instinct of procreation is constantly compels them to seek sex on the side. These suggestions to suppress the influence of the instincts can successfully use nizkoprimativnye people, ie those whom the instincts and so bugged is not very strong. And their easy to use vysokoprimativnym people who have instincts play a crucial role in decision making and provides them with many problems. These features of the unconscious human behavior need to know and to manage them so that they can not control you.