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Why be afraid of children


Articles Contents
Why be afraid of children?

What is a children's fears? Sleep disorder or other mental illness of the child? Or, children's whims? Fudge children in an attempt to draw attention to themselves adults? Why be afraid of children? " On this question we are to respond. And let's try to treat the issue seriously: to understand the causes of children's fears - means to help our children get rid of them and gain confidence. Most adults as it is strange, says children's fears inventions kids, their whims and not paying them enough attention. "Not making this up!" - Says the child rationally minded father - no Barmaley not exist in nature, so immediately go to sleep and close your eyes! "And no wonder that after such a rebuke fear in the child not only persists, but has intensified, and the constant expectation what is now the room will be an evil Barmalej, can lead to chronic sleep disturbances, and even to neurosis.

At what age are children's fears?

Should not take the child as a toy or as nothing smyslyaschee creature. Already 4 months baby emotionally responsive to the presence or absence of people close to him. At 7 months he was very responsive to the care of the mother begins to worry about, experiencing anxiety and ... fear. Yes, yes, fear, fear of loneliness! Next to his mother support the child feels, he knows that she will protect him, warm hands and gentle voice of his mother inspire confidence, while its absence is traumatic.
And if the mother is unable to properly respond to such a manifestation of fear of the baby, it could turn into a fear of loneliness, fear of losing a loved one. Why the fear of loneliness? Even when a child is born, he is still associated with the mother the umbilical cord, but now is not material and emotional. Mother and child perceives himself as a single, indivisible whole. When he realizes caring mother, he ceases to feel the support and care, and therefore there is concern that passes into the fear.

Child grows up to two years beginning osoznovat himself in this world as a person and understand their difference from other people. Fear of loneliness is dulled, it is not so sharp, but still remains "Mama, do not go, I'm afraid!" - Two crying baby and the mother just can not imagine what he may become frightened. But in reality he is simply afraid to be alone, face to face with such a hostile and frightening world. so sharp, but still remains. A child at this age tends to imitate adults, unconsciously copying their gestures, facial expressions, thinking. Mother to him - an example of an already established self. It is perceived as a source of security and basic needs. Therefore, its presence calms the baby.

Around the age of three when the baby is familiar with the environment - adults read books to him, he looks up and sees a picture cartoons. Fear of strangers may be the consequence of fear of fabulous characters, of the unknown is still the unknown world. If the fear of loneliness, most likely related to the social aspect - the fear of being rejected by society, the fear of the unknown world and the fairy-tale characters is based largely on self-preservation instinct. The child instinctively fears for his life and health.

This fear is experiencing almost all children. But with the right education and support of friendly adults, it passes quickly. When unfavorable circumstances - the presence of anxiety and fear of adults surrounding the child, their disregard for his emotional states - anxiety develops into anxiety and fear - a timidity that are subsequently formed into stable character traits. If children under 3 years of experience most instinctive fears, the fears of older children already understood and specified.

Baba Yaga

Any parent or caregiver can call the move a lot of children's fears. One child is afraid to ride a roller coaster, climbing on anything other hysterically afraid of water and would not agree to swim in the pool, and the third is horrified at the sight of an unfamiliar dog, and the fourth begins to cry as soon as you hear the word "doctor" or " prick. " In 3-5 years, children are afraid of fantasy characters or animals, which contribute to many adults. Not just once or twice you can hear my mother, putting baby to bed, tells him: "Shut your eyes more, and now the Baba Yaga will come!"

And his intonation mother shows that she is afraid of this terrible Baba Yaga. What can we say about the kid! Initially, it copies the fear of the mother, he is not feeling it, because they do not know, looks like this is that Baba Yaga and how it can hurt someone. But when he sees the appropriate image in the book of fairy tales, cartoons look "with" Baba Yaga and heard plenty of stories of adults about what this Baba Yaga is an evil, and as it does with unruly children, a baby begins to fear for real. For children of this age is also characterized by a fear of bad dreams, fear of certain animals, fear of depth, fire, fear of punishment.

Fear of death

In the five-six years of age children are most often experiencing fear of death. Needless to say, even an adult is difficult to understand how the world will survive without him, and come to terms with this fact the child to do it even more difficult. Why the fear of death appears in this age? This is due to the peculiarities of the intellectual development of the baby. He learns the meaning of words such as "time", "age", "life", and with them there and the fear of death. The child is still not clear until the end of the mystery of birth, but now realize that the end of all is death, already comes in and makes him either incomparable horror.

Parents should not think that the fear of death in this age - pathology. Such fear is the affective-sharp instinct for self-expression. He, like all fears, to a greater degree of inherent emotional children. In children, the same with mental retardation, with a psychopathic, disinhibition, and aggressive behavior, as well as children whose parents suffer from chronic alcoholism fear of death does not develop. How do you determine that a child has the fear of death? Often, this fear can be expressed through the presence of other, closely related fears - fear of nightmares, attacks, disease, natural elements (water, fire (fire).

With the fear of death is also connected and the fear of animals: "I'm afraid the dog, she had me zagryzet," "I'm afraid the worm, it looks like a snake and it bites" - complaining about the children. Everything that is not understood by them or associated with death, can cause painful horror. Five-six-year children are very afraid of medical procedures, and linking them with pain and death. The clinic can often observe blubbered kid at the door vaccination study. Mom tries to persuade a child: "What are you, a big boy! Previously, some shots you do not afraid! ", Not knowing that the fear caused by the syringe to the understanding of the child, that he might die (pain can lead to death).

At this age, the child suffers heavy sickness or death of people close to him or animals. It's not even sympathy to them, and a pronounced fear that this could happen to him. The emergence of the fear of death should talk to parents about the child matures. Life itself is perceived by the five-six-year old little man so that the category of death is recognized them as inevitable. Fear of death arises from the unwillingness to recognize this inevitability of emotional rejection of the need to die.

Fear of being alone is closely related to fear of being unloved. Not by chance the child often repeats: "Mom, you love me?" For him it is a way to make sure that everything goes well, he was not left alone with this huge, unknown and terrifying world. Fear of rejection suggests that your child matures, more and more delves into the essence of life and realizes that one (and in addition unloved) living pitifully.
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