What exactly do I want?
In general, it is logical that in order to get what I want, you should first understand exactly what I want . This is the first step of any undertaking - the scanning yourself in order to determine the true needs. At this stage we await numerous traps.
Trap first
Do not know what I want. Refuse or scared of knowledge about it. This is a very common trap, because we are a long time and methodically taught not to trust your feelings. Remember, as you say: "Oh no, you do not get hot, put on gloves immediately. Or: "No, this is a sweet porridge (salted burger)." Over time, we get used to not trust what we feel we do not consider the information received by our senses, reliable. Thus was born the habit of not trusting yourself, and trust others, believe that others know better what you need.
Second trap
Desired mix with something else. Untrue desire. It is also quite common trap, because from childhood we learn to want what they want mom and dad. You've probably heard more than once, as parents tell children: "Oh no, here it is a good machine. Let's buy it "or:" You have to dance. I've always dreamed of, so you should. " Explaining that bad, but it's good that wish to correct and should be, and what not, we are trained to overlook and ignore their "abnormal" desires. We come into this world of individuals, different from others, and early in life is to realize and is perceived as being right and natural.
The infant has no understanding, "what is good and what is bad, you have to be like Peter or Mary, as a mom or dad. It has its own individual needs and desires of which he specifically and unequivocally says. If a similar respect and support his personality and his needs, the child grows, continuing to realize the Self and developing it. But often, even before the birth of the baby's parents have their own vision of what will be their child. And when we are born, we begin to sculpt the image and likeness. Parents know when a child wants to eat when he is cold or hot, what his abilities and who he wanted to be when he grows up, with whom he befriend and whom to marry. So we forget who we really are, and begin to live other people's desires and needs, forgetting their own.
Trap third
Inhibitions have that desire. Inability to estimate. Various ethical rules, norms, conscience, and faith in their own strength and abilities in what we are entitled to something or wish to have prevented us to determine exactly what we want. These bans are also imposed by adults, and now you have a wonderful opportunity: the revision of them. Relevant whether they are for you? Someone is still standing behind you and tells you what's good and what is bad, you have to do and what not? If your environment does have such people - to prevent them decide for you and give you advice. You have the right to live his own life the way you want them to order. Your life belongs only to you and nobody else.
If a person is not sure of himself, believes that he is not competent, able, talented, that he had something will not work or will not completely wrong, his view of the world will always contain conflicting messages, eg "I I want to take a leadership position "-" I'm for anything serious is not capable. " Or "I want to marry the man of her dreams" - "I do not deserve anything good." Diffident people - one in whose minds there are many limiting beliefs from the others. These beliefs about yourself will never let a man get what he wants, even if desired will go to him directly in his hands.
Objectives
Always calculate "the pluses and minuses to an end. Marshall in the mind of a system of probability, which gives opportunity to see what can be done if you do this. "Calculate in advance of complexity. Maybe there is something that can prevent it? How can you change it? That you can help here? Note: The search for obstacles and interference need not to abandon the goal (as many do), but in order to advance to come up with a way to overcome the difficulties. Examine whether there is in you kontrzhelaniya, the other needs, which is an obstacle to the execution of the first? Say, you may want to buy bread, and likewise you may want to continue to lie in bed.
Breaking the goal into steps to achieve sub-goals, you make your move forward feasible, the implementation of your steps available. Small goals are always more achievable than the one big goal. If you reach the sub, successfully taking the first step, you will be easier to make a second. On the gradual achievement of purpose built work musician beats on learning to sketch, the work of a dancer learns movement, and many other activities.
Write in his notebook 50 targets and objectives that you want to implement in their lives. Write to the maximum detail. At one point - no more than one desires. That is, you should not write "to update a wardrobe", and "buy pants," the following paragraph "to buy new shoes, etc. Every desire should be very specific as possible, for example, not just "go on vacation," but "go on vacation in Bulgaria." Now tick the desires which you want to implement on a priority basis, then in the second turn. Thus, Rank your desire for significance.
Hang a piece of paper with wishes of a wall around your desktop. As the fulfillment of dreams cross out items. It is also helpful to make a list of gifts that you want to receive for the holidays (so-called vish-list). In order to get what you want, you must first understand exactly what you want. Formulated the goal, determine how and in what ways you can and are willing to achieve it. Analyze the implications of achieving the goal, the possible advantages and disadvantages.
