Surely, you were very proud when my mother as a child tells you: "You're big! Shnurochki learned how to tie / no cry / apartment cleaned. And then you are very worried when my mother in a fit of frustration expressed: "Well, then. You, it turns out she did not know how to do it. It's about time you become more independent. " My husband's mother always said: "You're just born adults. You never cried. At you could rely on and leave you with a younger brother. You all were my mainstay. You've always been more mature peers. Children brainwashed this directive does not like to play with other guys, they sit home and read books - they are teachers pets, because with them there is no problem - they are well behaved and good horoshisty. They want to quickly become adults, intelligent and independent, to help my mother around. And when grown up, then be afraid to show their weakness will not allow themselves to cry and can not ask anyone about anything. They used to rely only on themselves. They did not trust anyone. They are determined and serious, practical, intelligent, pragmatic, but I did not know how to enjoy life.

Life for these people - hard, hard work. Matured "nedeti" can never learn to fully rest and relax, as always feel guilty for their "children's" wishes and needs. Everything else, such a person is a hard barrier in communicating with children. Own or someone else does not matter. Share their interests and live a life with such a person does not know how. He is easier to involve the child in her adult life, passing to the directive "do not be a child." "What you behave like a little", "You have a big to do so," "You - my only support." Involuntarily the man describes the condition of the child "maturity" as something that is very good, but a state of "childlike" as something to be feared and what to avoid.

What should I do find myself in such a directive? " Allow yourself to children's desires! For example, buy a huge teddy bear and sleep with him or Barbie dolls, which can be dressed up, which you can comb your hair in the evenings. This is not ashamed! Pamper yourself various goodies - fruit, ice cream and candy. Are building a "secret" and hide in them the same thing "cherished", checking occasionally on the ground or not. Tongue, sing on the street, as if no one hears him, dance in the park, as if no one sees, laugh when you want and, of course, allow myself a little cry, and sometimes even in the presence of other people ...